CCC: Eric, you've been in dozens of films. Mask, Pulp Fiction, Rob Roy just to name a few. Now, you've been in the business for...ahhh, screw it. Why won't you give us the footage?
ES: Footage?
CCC: The Back the the Future footage, why won't you let us have it?
ES: I..umm...I don't know what you mean...
CCC: Oh the hell you don't! Everybody knows you were fired after filming half of Back to the Future and replaced with Michael J. Fox! Just give us the footage! You're delaying the dvd release!
ES: Look, would you want footage released of you in a film after you were fired from it?
CCC: Sure. I was replaced by Jeff Goldblum in...Planet...umm...Minker-Wonker 7. It has my footage.
ES: That's not even a real movie!
CCC: Uhhhh...yeah it is. It only came out on beta...in...Malaysia.
ES: You're full of sh*t!
CCC: Look, let's not bring obscenity into this you f*ckstick, just sign the release form and we'll all have our dvds and be happy.
ES: I'm not signing so just forget about it.
CCC: Aren't we stubborn. No wonder you were fired.
ES: A**hole.
CCC: Fine. Forget about you being fired from Back to the Future because you stunk and the had to be replaced by Michael J. Fox in the movie which went on to make $540 billion dollars and sweep the Oscars 3 years in a row...
ES: That's not even possible!
CCC: Look, I personally think you're a pretty good actor...
ES: Well thanks I guess...
CCC:...but what's up with the roles you sign on for? I mean, I'm looking at your filmography and I don't even remember you being in Shaft...or Unbreakable...or...
ES: That's Sam Jackson's filmography you schmuck.
CCC: Oh right...he's successful...
ES: That's it! I'm outta here!
CCC: Not so fast McFly, I paid Cruise 10 bucks to keep you here for the entire hour, so you tell Emilio to just keep the Camry running.
ES: Agghhh!!
CCC: Ok, so I've seen the trailer for your new film, The Rules of Attraction and it's looking quite intriguing. Why don't you tell us about it?
ES: Really? Well, ok. I play Mr. Lawson and...
CCC: GIVE US THE FOOTAGE!!!
ES: For the last time, NO!
CCC: Be that way then. Anyway, you have worked with Christopher Walken on a few occasions. What's it like working with such a legend?
ES: Well...I...like...working with Chris. He...has a certain...demeanor...
CCC: I'm sorry...what are you doing?
ES: I'm...doing my...Chris Walken...impression...and...the dogs are...
CCC: That a horrible Walken impression!
ES: Oh like you could do better.
CCC: Hell yeah I can!
ES: Let's hear it then.
CCC: I'm...Chris Walken and....you...my friend...are gonna pay...
ES: I said WALKEN not Shatner.
CCC: Right right. Let me try again. You...can't escape...the clowns...and the gnomes of...doom...
ES: You suck.
CCC:....
ES:....
CCC: FOOTAGE!!
ES: NO!!
CCC: You know, I'm trying to be a gracious host here but you insist on being rude.
ES: What?? All you keep talking about is Back to the Future. You're the one being rude.
CCC: I didn't mention Prophecy yet.
ES: True. Hey wait, you just did.
CCC: What was with that movie anyways? It started out really good, then just kinda crapped out.
ES: If you notice, it started crapping out after my character died.
CCC: Yeah, you're right. Well that's weird...a movie bombing AFTER you're gone.
ES: OK! Time's up! I'm gone!
CCC: Ok ok...just 1 more question...
ES: As long as it's not about the footage.
CCC: Footage? What do you mean?
ES: Yeah..the Back to the Future footage? Hello?
CCC: Oh yeah, weren't you fired from that?
ES: AGGHHHH!!!!!
Eric then jumped into Emilio Estevez's '86 Camry and sped of towards Molly Ringwald's house.
All interviews are completely untrue
